The Home Stretch (Marks)

Our due date rolls around in just 5 days. Although I could go for another week or two after that, I do feel her coming on! Anthony is just as excited as I am, possibly more, and our bags are packed and waiting by the door.

I don't post status updates about my pregnancy on Facebook every five minutes (although it seems like things are happening every five minutes!), and neither have I been faithful to blog about the little milestones and miracles along this journey. If I were to be honest with myself, it's because I am afraid of being relegated to the mommy corner, the one where you only talk about cloth diapers, nursing schedules and what your baby has been doing lately. I want to talk about these things but am afraid of losing some type of sense of my own identity, one I think and hope to be more complex than just changing diapers.

This is my own poor perspective of motherhood (and my purpose when writing). I confessed my fears of being "mommy Melissa" to Anthony, and he kindly suggested that I should embrace the inclusion of my personal motherhood experiences in this blog. The conversation ended simply with him asking, "Well, that's what you are going to be, right? It's now part of who you are and you write about everything else". How simple and true! Just because I crave some sense of privacy and autonomy with my daily practices doesn't mean I have to live silently.

That said, here's a blog inside a blog: my list of random pregnancy observations.

1. Most of the cliches are true. Most of the pregnancy books' statements are true. It's still an incredible shock when they happen to you. I'm talking about you, stretch marks.

2. It is a rare moment when I forget I'm pregnant. I wake up thinking about her, and my body, from week 7, wouldn't let me do anything else but pay attention.

3. First trimester = 24/7 morning sickness and exaustion; second trimester = slight weight gain, energy for exercising and a real live baby bump; third trimester = man-sized appetite, a big ol' belly and crying for joy over the tiniest socks.

4. I am both more and less judgmental of parents now. More because I actually have an opinion about parenting things (immunizations, etc.), and less because I know how poorly I receive personal criticism and sometimes there's no need to discuss opinions if they're just that.

5. Pregnancy is a privilege. I am so thankful for my health and although there were very difficult days on my body, I have never been in need of food, health care or shelter. Often as I thought to (and did) complain about a sore back, bleeding gums or my love/hate relationship with tomatoes, I was reminded that many, many women would do anything to experience these things if they meant that they could bear a child. Small price for an undeserved blessing.

.... Hopefully my next post will have a picture of our whole out-of-the-womb family! Unless I get really antsy and decide to tackle some Middle East peace issues on here before then.