Get bat colony in attic.
Flee to Florida with dog and baby.
Visit favorite city, site of engagement, and fancy food market.
Spend the weekend with best married friends and their boy.
Have yummy brunch with girlfriends. Dive into that dairy.
Pack a Saturday with a neighborhood walk, the junior museum, and kiddie pool baby nakedness.
Get truck washed -- for free!
Go to home church. Get hugged by my pastor before I reach the door.
Introduce my mother-in-law to Mad Men. Forget about the risque scenes and stare straight ahead in embarrassment.
Have lunch with Emmy's 3rd, Filipina grandma and Auntie Nessa.
Walk my hometown for hours with the jogging stroller.
Pull a Laura Bush and talk to a kindergarten class about the Army.
Get seen by Anthony's old classmates. Feel vain about my looks at said moment. Be glad I dressed up.
Play hookie with high-school sister.
Watch Emmy throw a royal fit at Super Canton. See rice fly.
Applaud same sister at poetry contest. Try to steal her prize money.
Eat homemade tortilla.
Wash dirtiest dog in the world back to a pristine white coat.
Devour a Piggly Wiggly lunch plate with father-in-law. Listen in to him softly picking and humming "All Creatures of Our God and King."
Pack the truck.
Drink a Mr. Pibb.
Return to (so-far) bat-free home.
BEST CHECKLIST EVER.